Back At ‘Er

So…. yeah. That was a bit of a gap eh?

Oops. Sorry dudes.

The past 8 months have been sorta a “head in the sand”, “idontwannaidontwanna” approach to planfully (that is a word, I say it is!) in the notsoplanful sense attack this whole conceiving thing.

Everything was getting overwhelming. So. We stopped everything except a few more Gyno appointments. Which were awful since the guy was a huge douche bag. No really. I plan on telling a few of those stories in posts to come.

And then, after a holiday season filled with stupid amounts of alcohol (because who’re we kidding, I was saying a huge fuck you to the preggers plan), we came out on the other side of 2015 with the agreement that we’d restart this whole ordeal.

Oh it’s not to say we weren’t TRYING these past months. We were. It’s just I stopped taking the Vitex, vitamins, seed smoothie regimen my Naturopath had put me on AND gave up on the temperature taking (it was just stressing me the fuck out with absofreakinglutely NO pattern whatsoever), stopped seeing the Naturopath altogether.

The only thing I kinda took sorta regularly: Folic Acid. Cuz no spina bifida for me.

The last week of December we made our appointment with the fertility clinic. An admission of failure. (at least, that’s what it felt like).

Had our appointment this morning.

3% chance of conceiving each month. 3-effing-percent. What.The.Fuck.

I barely heard the rest- which was basically a bunch of stuff about IVF. And needles. Drugs, injection classes, blood work and oh yeah- more needles. And “Good news, since we have no freakin’ clue WHY you’re not conceiving, you are GOOD candidates for IVF!”

All I am hearing right now is the massive procreation fail.

Oh and the 16,000$ price tag. This news a week after husband was laid off. Amazeballs.